So, I just started dating this guy and all was going well until he said something last night that is still on my mind. I will talk to him about it later, but for now I am just gonna put it all out there. In context, we were having an honest conversation of fears of a relationship, if we like each other and want to continue dating, all that fun stuff. He said one of his fears about me was that I grew up in Idaho and he had met a lot of people from there who were missing some important things. When I asked what they were missing his reply was ethics and morals. WHAT??!!??
Okay, I'll admit I wasn't always a good girl. I went to church all my life, but junior and senior year I explored the not so "Christian" world of drinking and parties. Did it corrupt me? No. Do I lack morals and ethical values? Absolutely not! And, no one I still know and love who lives there is like this at all. I feel like he made a very gross generalization, and I am honestly quite offended by it. First of all, now I feel like I have to prove I'm different, and I shouldn't have to prove anything to anyone. I just want to be who I am. Second of all, I am the first to admit I ran from Idaho and tried to leave a lot of pain behind when I did. But a lot of it was teenage stuff - fighting with my mom, being "bored" b/c there was "nothing to do in Idaho" (I've since learned that is so NOT true!), and in general just wanting to be in a bigger city. The 19 year old version of myself wanted to get out and explore, but not because I was morally void, but because I wanted to see what else was out there.
My family still lives there and so do some of my favorite people ever. I honestly want to find someone who would be open to moving back there one day so I could be close to my family again. I don't think I would ever judge someone because of where they came from. I may make assumptions, but I try to give people a chance to show me who they are before I decide, they are where they came from. Am I crazy to be bothered by this? Are my "momma-bird" instincts coming up because Idaho is like that little sibling only you are allowed to make fun of but if anyone else does you will kick their ass? :) That may more of it than anything, but I don't know. It just bugs me... and I wish he wouldn't have said it...
4 comments:
I don't know if I would really read into it that much, but at the same time I see what you mean. I am a Mormon and I get that all the time. There are all kinds out there. Some Mormons may be the nicest people you ever meet, others...not so much. But does that mean you judge an entire church based on a few of the members you have met? I LOVE Idaho! I love Idahoans! I would totally hope my special someone would want to move to my home some day. Maybe just prove him wrong. And maybe someday bring him here to show him how amazing it really is. Good luck!
I grew up in Washington and moved to Idaho before high school (like the February of 8th grade, how rad is that?). I was also the first person to say, "Get me out of here!" and have since lived in different places. However, I will say that Idaho has grown a lot (not just population) since I moved there in 1998. There are a lot of cultures and languages and stores and restaurants and you still have a lot of "good ol' Idaho values" but at the same time, I think it's a place that is moving and grooving and changing a lot from the cowboy days. Much more so than Wyoming. So I get kind of annoyed when people think negatively on Idaho - and for whatever reason, Garbs is in LOVE with Boise and wants to move there someday. So I can understand why you are a bit irritated. Got your back :)
That's batshit crazy! Haha I hate a state because I went to cowgirls in kuna haha. Jk ask him about it, do it with sarcasm so He realizes how dumb you think that statement was haha
That makes me kind of sad. I LOVE Idaho. Of course I've never really lived anywhere else to make a fair judgement call on that one. =) I think if he's going to be close minded about it you have to figure out if he's close minded about other things too. If he's open to finding out how cool Idaho can be then there you go right?
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