Somethin' to Blog About

It happened. I really really thought it would never happen. I am finally comfortable being single. I'm not just saying it or writing it to hope it's true. It is true. How did it happen? Well... I realized how embarrassed I am of my ex boyfriend. I won't say who it is, but let's just say he was sooooo not right for me. I like shopping, nice things, going out, wine, and he wanted to live in a car, shop at a thrift store and drink 40's. I was like, if any of my friends see him, they would be like, "What did you see in him?" Which got me to ask myself, "What did I see in him?"

Well, to answer that, I have to go back to where I was at the beginning of 2009. I had just had my heart BROKEN. I loved loved loved the guy I was with (although, to be honest he was not the best guy for me either, but I couldn't see that yet). I had dated him for a year and just thought he was IT. Until he dumped me, of course. I was devastated. And, thinking 25 was practically 80 decided I HAD to find someone to marry because I was getting so old. (I say this now realizing how ridiculous it sounds.) So, an old friend came back into my life and I convinced myself we would be together and it would be perfect.

It was not. It was awful with a couple moments of fun thrown in between. We were just soooo different. And because I was so desperate to not be single (as that was for sure the kiss of death), I kept him for fear of not being alone. Until, I couldn't go on pretending. And, then it was over. I dated this person for almost 8 months just to not be single.

I look back on it now, and am like, seriously???? Holly Madison said it best a few months ago with "I'd rather be single than with a douche." I agreed, but my actions before have proved differently. But, at this point in my life I would rather be single than just with someone. I honestly never thought this day would come. I so thought I would be married by this time in my life and I convinced myself that I had to find someone, instead of allowing the right person and me to find each other. Instead of just me latching on to someone so wrong for me. I never thought I'd be that girl.

So, it took a year and three months being single to get there, but I'm there. I am so happy with my life right now. I love the friends I have surrounded myself with. I love the freedom I have to live alone and start school again without having to worry about anyone but me. Which is perfect for right now. I am finishing up my last educational goals without having to worry about having to make time for anyone but my friends. I can't wait to start now. I finally finished all the financial aid crap and am all registered and ready to go. I swear they make it super difficult to test your dedication! :)

Well, that is all for now. Here's me and one of my girlfriends, Natalie having cocktails a couple weeks ago. Another fun perk of singleness, flirting with the cute server, who took this pic. :)